Personality disorder

Dear Lily,
This is responding to your post (so read lily's post people - second period). If you think its hard in A&M, imagine what it's like not getting accepted to college at all. As soon as we broke up in highschool, things went out of control and unorganized for me. I was so used to being attatched to you and having you influence almost all of my decisions, that when you left, I didn't know who to turn to. Noone was there to help me, and I think that most colleges denied me because of a horrible essay and inadequate application. Things just became so hard that I couldn't even concentrate on college apps, and I had noone to ask for help, so I think that they were a bit lacking. Life at home whomps. I can't make even the simplest decisions about what to eat, wear, what song to listen to, or anything, and it leads to my frustration. Yesterday I spent 3 hours at the grocery store to buy milk, eggs, cereal, candy, and cookies. I didn't know which cookies to get, which type of milk to get, how many eggs. I feel like aufahfhdhf;ahfd;ha. I ended up calling my mom and she told me what to get so it's all good. Anyways, now I feel like I do things for everyone else and not myself. I'm always seeking approval from others because they are the only people that can help me reach a decision. Also, my work ethic has dramatically dropped since my senior year in high school. I can't get myself to do any work or projects because I don't think that I can do them right. I hate being alone and now my parents pretty much rule my life. I have to ask my mom for everything, and I always do what she says, especially because she takes care of me. I'm not sure what to do with my life right now. My parents want me to apply to another college like UH or HCC. I just don't know what the right thing is though. When you were here, I had a plan and goal of being a pediatrician. I don't think that will ever happen anymore. All my friends turn on me because I bug them too much, especially since they're in college. Anyways, I hope your roommate grows up soon. Don't worry so much about her, and maybe in the future you can live by yourself. I hope you're getting taken care of up there. Don't miss me anymore because I've changed in a way you don't like. I hope you're happy. Love, Nick Dumlao.